Script Frenzy: A Kiss Good-bye

Before I bid farewell to my old Frenzy script, which I've taken to calling “First Kiss” in absence of the imagination to think of anything better (I mean, sure, given the subject material I want to make some kind of vague allusion to the Virgins. To make much of time. Y'know, “Gather Ye Rosebuds” or “The Same Dying Flower” but that's way too pretentious even for me. “First Kiss” tells you everything you need to know right there in two words. It's not exactly poetry but it's utilitarian and that works.), I'd like to post an excerpt. I put a smaller snippet of this in my profile on the frenzy boards but, here's an extended version.

To set up the scene, this is the first meeting between my main character, named Arturo, an intelligent but withdrawn 11~12 year old nicknamed Artie, and one of the chief corners of the love polyhedron I was setting up, a precocious young hipster whom I've come to loathe named Rose. As the story goes, it's summer and it's hot and Artie's family has gone to the local Dairy Queen (Or whatever ice cream shop I was going to wind up with.) for a late night treat to cool off. Rose has spent a few minutes trying, in her mind anyway, to flirt with Artie and the little vamp has finally succeeded in seducing him into a conversation. Like most of the best stuff I wrote for “First Kiss” it's mostly dialog. Which makes sense since that's really one of my stronger points. Artie I don't get down so well in this piece but, honestly, his character's been bouncing all over the place. But I like this one because it's the part of the script where I realize just how much I hate Rose and that I'm subconsciously working to sabotage her – look for an increasingly annoying personal tic that I threw in on a whim. It's one of those little, unintentional things that makes things like Frenzy so fun. And I think it also points out exactly why I'm throwing up my hands on this script for the time being.

Sorry about the formating but my Blogger plays silly buggers with indentation and the like.

ROSE
You're Arthur Whittenberg, aren't you? From Ms. Havlosyk's 7th grade class?

ARTIE
Um...yes. Well...

ROSE
Rose Peck, from Mr. Cavaton's. Pleased to meet you.

ARTIE
Isn't that a 6th grade class?

ROSE
(Mock pretends she's flattered, batting her eyes and holding her hand to her chest.)
Why yes it is, how wonderful of you to notice. That was sarcasm, by the way. Are you often in the habit of pointing out the blandly obvious, Arthur?

ARTIE
Arturo.

ROSE
I do beg your pardon?

ARTIE
My name. Artie's short for Arturo. Not Arthur.

ROSE
Arturo Whittenberg?
(Artie nods. She barks a brief, extremely undignified laugh.)
Your name is almost as bad as mine. Why do you suppose parents do that?

ARTIE
Do what?

ROSE
Saddle their children with the most annoyingly pedestrian names. Mine, for instance, persist in calling me Rosie despite no end of correction on my part. I much prefer my given name, Rose.
(wrinkles her nose up.)
Rosie. It's horrible gauche, don't you think?

ARTIE
[something about a culture where people chose their own names, eventually.]

ROSE
Oh, that would be better, wouldn't it? I do like that. I think I was right about you, Arturo.

ARTIE
You were right about me?

ROSE
That you were intelligent. The boys in my class are such awful dullards. I need company to keep me stimulated
(she draws the word out coyly although the innuendo is lost on Artie.)
...intellectually, you understand. Most people just aren't on my level, it's so rare to find someone to have a decent conversation with.

ARTIE
I...well, I feel like that myself sometimes. I guess.

ROSE
Sigh, it just hasn't been the same since we got back from France. We visited Paris, you know. The lights, the color, it was fabulous. And the people there were so worldly and cultured, it was amazing. Really, though, the highlight of the trip was [some city in Holland]. There was this coffee place where we sat and discussed literature for simply hours. Have you ever been to Holland, Arturo?

ARTIE
Um, sure, we used to go to the Tulip Time Festival every summer. Back when my parents were still together, anyway.

ROSE
Tulip Time Festival?

ARTIE
Yeah, they have a parade, clog dancing, and everything. It's not exactly what you'd call entertaining but it's a fascinating glimpse into another culture.

ROSE
(laughing great big, horking snorts)
Oh, Artie, it's like we're in completely different worlds.

ARTIE
Um...

ROSE
Holland, Europe you silly, foolish, man.

ARTIE
Oh, no, Tulip Time is in Holland, Michigan. I've never been to Europe.

ROSE
Oh, you simply must. It's fantastic. Travel broadens the mind, they say.

ARTIE
G.K.Chesterton said before travel can broaden the mind, you have to have the mind first.

ROSE
Well, I don't think that's a problem with you.
(laughs.)
We travel constantly, you know.

ARITE
(Rose has leaned in close, really close, brushing up against Artie.)
Um.

Ah, bother. I see I left some of my author's notes in place of, you know, actually writing something. Really emblematic of the way the whole script looks, really. And, damn, but do I hate Rose. I want her to suffocate on her own vomit after she accidentally drinks a mislabled household cleaning product. Yeah... Moving on.