Guild Wars: The Foretold Linkening Has Come

I now reach into my bag for that dirtiest of blogging tricks. That of passing along other people's content in lieu of my own.

I feel dirty.

But I also feel like I've missed a lot of things in the long, dark teatime of the solstice in which I've been lingering far too long. And that if I wanted to do them full justice I'd never get anything done. So, instead, I'm just going to pass along the links and move on. Works for you?

First, heard about this during the RAWR Cup coverage on the Weapon of Communist Choice (And, boy, do I want to tee off on that sometime.) and like most of these sort of things it's never going to find the eyeballs that really need to see it but, nothing ventured and all. Yue, one of the people who graciously donated his time and insight on the radio, put up a pretty comprehensive look at the Ranger over at QQ. Good for general theory, if you just want to know what weapons to run,a nd a nice look at the common wisdom in light of recent changes to some of the elites. I mean, really, the Ranger bar is pretty well set at this point, their role pretty well defined, and the devil, at this point, is really in the details. Like, do you want to run Crip Shot for movement control or Burning Arrow for pressure damage? Yue provides some good, objective reasoning for each and more.

Actually, most of the stickied threads in that subforum are worth a look. Just, you know, it's QQ so don't go too far in or else you will abandon your mind to the realms of madness. Sigh, I miss the iQ boards. I actually know of an alternative but I'm not sure if the link is public or not and I'm erring on the side of caution here.

Speaking of forum threads, here's an interesting one that a little bird pointed me to over at Guru. I tend to avoid the place because, you know, memories. I don't hang around with people after I break up with them and all, acrimonious or not, so make of that what you will. Anyway, it's a nice look at the problems with the Necromancer even though I take issues with the OP's assertion that the root cause is Soul Reaping. I think now that it's been set to reasonable levels and some other necessary nerfs have happened as well that a lot of other, unrelated issues have been thrown into sharp relief. In other words, I agree a lot more with Squidget. And, really, some interesting possibilities thrown about that bear some further thought - I'm rather taken by Two Tons' offhand comment about Blood Bond and the idea of....health battery play for lack of a better term. But, really, that thread's worth viewing to see Chuckles go off on someone. Honestly, when I read posts like that I picture him going all Henry Rollins, veins bulging on his neck, screaming at the monitor, and he pounds away at his keyboard with righteous fury. Even though I know he's realy mild mannered and reasonable and is just calmly and methodically picking someone apart.

Someone seriously needs to do a "Who would you cast?" kind of thread for top PvP players. You know, what actor/actress/notable person would play, say, Trex in GWWC: The Movie?

I'd do it myself but you have to understand that I'm very, very lazy.

Ah, let's see, turning from the world of the PvP hardcore to someplace entirely different, I thought I'd throw a reciprocal link to someone who's been kind enough to place me on their blogroll and mention that I've really been enjoying the venerable Van Hemlock's occassional forays into the world of Guild Wars. Here's the latest which, as usually, details a bit of the campaign in the kind of breezy entertaining travelogue style that makes me reluctant to continue my own Dungeon Diving series. Because, you know, not worthy and all. But what I want to flag out here is actually the second half, which is also a pretty standard feature of these posts, where the author talks about an off-the-wall build he's slapped together and run around with. It's the kind of stuff that makes a min-maxing vet like myself gnash my teeth and go, "Gah, no, no, no! That's, no, you have a nice idea there but you need to tweak it and, oh my god, are you trying to run e-denial in PvE?!? I just...ah!" as hundreds of hours of playing forum warrior and theorycrafting combined with thousands spent starring at skill lists and guides and advice and discussions and... Well, what I'm trying to say is that I'm well versed in these things. Even though it seems like I'm not when I look at things like obs mode and the like, I've been following, playing Guild Wars on and off for nearly four years now and I've passed the dicking around with stuff and hoping it works stage. As such, I look at those builds and I can't help scoff at tryign to make things like Tease work.

Yet, at the same time, I can't help but look on with no small envy, as well. I think about what I'd run in Guild Wars compared to a game like Mythos or HG:L or, hell, DOTA where I don't know the common wisdom about what works and what doesn't, and even less what the fuck I'm doing, and I feel like there's something I've missed. The joy of it. The passion of dabbling with new toys and seeing how they fit together and what makes them work. Frankly, I miss it. My Bartle type, after all, if I had to pick one (And I don't really want to becauseI don't think I'm the sort of really hardcore MUD player that the test was designed around. Much as I'm loathe to admit, I'm much more casual than that. Part of the crowd that's been drawn into MMOs by the increasing mainstreaming of the gaming hobby. And half the questions on the quiz don't even make sense to me, while my answers to the others flip around depending on how I feel that day. Perils of statistical analysis, really, but it just feels to me that there's a better test waiting to be developed.) would be Explorer. Which would probably be surprising to the people I play with, they'd likely peg me as an Achiever or a Killer. But not if you consider exploration of a game's mechanics and concepts to be akin to searching out new areas and places to take screenshots and all the rest that I don't care for. Because, for me, it's really all about the experience, the knowledge, as I delve deeper and deeper trying to find, not the next level or challenge, but a better understanding. It's, for lack of a better term, meaning that I hunt for. But I suppose I feel that, along the way, I lose something. Some of the excitement, the enjoyment, that comes with that initial rush of exploration. The easy acquisition, if you will, of the surface information. Just as difficulty curves ramp up, so, too, does the insight required, the processing cycles needed to burn through in order to grasp that next concept and the next and the next beyond. And by the time I'm getting to the useful stuff, the effective tips and tricks, having learned what works and what doesn't, I've become paralyzed by wanting to succeed. To continue to run further and faster up that slope of understand and, above all else, not to backslide. So I don't throw a bunch of shit together and see what happens. I don't try things out. I experiment. I don't sample the possibilities. I test and compare the known quantites. It's about rational, thoughtful, ponderous detail instead of, well, fun.

I think back on my time in the test. On when I used to offer to test the build of anyone who'd bother to post at my forums. To dabble with them and report back to them and everyone else just for the sheer thrill of being able to do so. The discoveries I made, the synergies I uncovered. Or how I scoured through skill list after skill list trying to come up with the perfect secondary skill to fill out a bar. Landing on things like a W/N and Blood Renewal and how it was so great because people hadn't clued into the importance of regeneration yet (Of course, my idea of a Warrior revolved around what would come to be a split character. Someone reliable, resiliant, and able to work away from the group while others were working on getting the most out of their DPS. In retrospect, I should have been playing around with a Ranger but, who knew?) How, back in a time before we knew about things like Gale Warriors, I'd played around with improving my knocklocks with spell based stuff with a hammer and thought to myself, "You know, I really like Shock. I bet I could do something with that instead of Aftershock.". Because, at the time, people were playing and winning tournaments with their Aftershockers.

So, when Van Hemlock says things like, "I suspect that a N/Me, ramping curses to 16, would do quite a bit better than Me/N me, but once again, I find myself surprised at just how different I can make the very moment to moment gameplay of Guild Wars, all without having to start an alt, simply by giving the skill icons a damned good shuffle!" (Which, well, no. Actually, kinda. Depends on what you're doing, really. It's better than it was at relesae when you could mirror a Me/N and a N/Me and not feel the difference. Necros and Mesmers are two profs that don't really benefit as much from maxing out their attributes. If you're doing a Spiteful Spirit thing and trying to maximize your damage then, yeah, you need the runes. But, most of the time you can get get by perfectly well with 8~12s in Curses and Illusions for their sticky hexes. The extra seconds and points in their variables just aren't that important. While something like Fast Casting to reduce the hefty hand waving time of the unwieldy stuff can be. Of course, so can SR in the death rich PvE environment we're talking about here to fuel the casting of the expensive stuff. As, I think, Van Hemlock's discovered, anything can work and it's all about trying to figure out how. And, you know, whether or not you should bother in the first place.) it really hits me somewhere soft, like the warm glow of a fireplace dancing along the wall. Because that, right there, is what I've forgotten, what I've missed for so long. That's what I love about this game and why I keep coming back to it time and time again. Because it unfolds, chrysanthemum like, in new and unexpected ways. All under your control, if you have but the time and the patience.

Elsewhere in the world of people who blog about games much, much better than I ever will, the always charming Brinstar beat me to it but there's also this nifty Wintersday Advent Calender (Is that a hat tip? Or do I, like, need to put my coat down across a puddle or something now? Gah, I'm so bad at this e-ttiquette stuff...). Always love the community driven projects like that. So, yeah...um. Yeah. I'm fresh out of insight here.

But, yes, Wintersday is on its way. Goes live this Friday, the 21st. I'm actually a bit pissed off, actually. I could care less about the quests and the thought of spending a few hours making sure I get another set of hats I'll likely never wear again isn't exactly keeping me up staring at the ceiling, my mind abuzz with potential (I will, however, make sure I get plenty of DP-erasing candy canes. Those should come in real handy in HM and dungeon diving.). No, the real draw for me is the new PvP format. I loves me some casual play, after all, and the opportunity to further work on my Gamer track. And, although I had no rational expectation for it, I was hoping this holiday season would see the return of the Costume Brawl instead of the Snowball Fights. Reworked, maybe, with some new bars and a holiday theme, but that same basic gameplay. Instead, it looks like the same old snowball fights which, don't get me wrong, are nice and all. But having seen the glory that is the Costume Brawl it's hard to go back to anything else. And harder still to think that it'll be month and month before that format gets another chance to shine.

Oh, who am I kidding? I'm still going to play it to exhaution. I've been reviewing snowball strat and skill descriptions already. I've even got my character all set up to take advantage of the format's oddities - things like +enchantment mods and runes of restoration still work, giving you a slight but still appreciable edge. To start with I'm rolling with what works so well for me last year, the Elementalist. Love the snaring, although I'll probably end up switching as the event wears on. I guestimate that I need to rack up about 250 gamer points a day if I want to just barely miss my next rank so I should be around plenty. Really, the only reason I did this is because I had an awesome Snowball Arena name float through my head and had to make sure I reserved it. And, yes, it is mine now.

Names are really important when I PvP. After all, if I'm going to suck, at least I can suck up the place with style.

NaNo Blogging: Paying It Backwards

November draws to a close. The flurry of creativity has turned into a mad scramble to get to the word validator in time. I'm, of course, sitting pretty in purple having taken care of that several days ago. But it also means that it's time for another NaNo tradition: begging for cash.

National Novel Writing Month, after all, is run by a non-profit. It takes donations to keep it well funded. And that means, like public radio or PBS, the pledge drive is on and e-mails and letters and posts fly asking anyone who can to spare a bit of their money in order to keep the project solvent. Now, this is annoying and, frankly off-putting but it works. The staffers send out the call to arms and enough people respond to make it worth their while. It takes begging, shouting, cajoling, and everything else possible to convince that small percent of people who'll actually donate to part with their money. And, second, it really is for a good cause. The money goes not just to keeping the website up but to helping teachers and (In the past, at least) libraries and more.

But, the sad truth is that some people just don't have the money to spare. This is especially true in my home region. We're currently #49 in the international word war. I'm pleased to report that my own herculean efforts are a mere single digit percentage of the overall total (My other selected home region, Ann Arbor, home of the University of Michigan clocks in respectably in the top 100 thanks to impressive per writer word count average.). But the depressed and depressing economic conditions of my home state of Michigan mean that we're well behind par when it comes to the money race. Donating less than a thousand dollars overall. When the paper is full of talk of layoffs and foreclosures and the unemployment rate is well above the national average, it's hard to fault us for that is it? But that doesn't mean we can't contribute.

Because, in fact, even if you don't send a drop of money the NaNo way you can still help them out. Firstly, there are a number of sites who'll donate some of the proceeds of any sale to the Office of Letters and Light. But, more importantly, there are also a number of ways to contribute money to the cause without spending any of your own.

I'll flag out GoodSearch as a particularly effective option. I've been using it since Script Frenzy myself and I don't have any complaints. Every time you perform a web search through that engine a small amount is given to NaNo. It's not much but think about how many searches you make in a day, a month, a year. Because it all adds up. Since June of this year, for example, people have raised over $700 for NaNo through their searches. There was a huge spike once NaNo kicked off in October but that works out to a few thousand a year. The more people, the more searches, the better. And since it's something that I'd do anyways, it makes sense to me.

But, whatever the way, if you've enjoyed the month, if you want to see it continue, try and make sure that you find some way. Even if it's only spreading the word.

Reflex Tester aka This Is Why I Don't Mesmer

(Tip of the Lieutenant's Helm to Van Hemlock. Who has an awesome site, by the way, if I had a blogroll it'd be on it. I really should have a blogroll again...)

This is an immensely fun waste of time. A twitch game with all the extraneous crap removed.

By the way, I score around the wrong side of 200 which puts me right around average according to the site's statistics - I have to believe there's something of a self-selection error at work there, though. And, generally, on the days I've tried it, put me in the daily top 100. Around the 70~90 range but, still.

I'm actually a bit disappointed by those results since I think it's yet further proof of my physical and mental deterioration. I can consistently get below 200 into the 180~190 range but there's always that one result that's way higher to throw my average off. Interestingly, that's usually the first click. And I also tend to do better the faster the box turns green - the longer I have to wait, the more likely I am to space out and miss the change for a precious tick. But I have this nagging suspicion that if I'd tried five years ago or even last year that I'd have done much better.

The E-King is Pleased

Yay, Clammy's not dead! As I believe I stated earlier, he had a child and as anyone who's done so knows that means a massive personal time sink. Good to see that the world is now more gamer-spawn richer. And even better to see that the father might be expending less effort on meaningless things like parenting and getting back to providing me with the occasional smile.

But, since I'm horrible about checking RSS feeds, I might not have noticed if I hadn't bumped int the always charming Brinstar at the NaNo site (Learning from previous events where gaming threads for places like WoW or RO quickly overwhelmed the Clubs and Groups subforums, they've got a place set aside for them this year and, sure enough, there's a thread for Guild Wars addicts.). And followed a link from her site - which is generally a nice place to visit and I keep meaning to find an excuse to comment/link to it which I think I just have - to this blast from Clammy's past. The guide, full of tips and advice for those trying to get into PvP, is a great resource, something I'd point anyone interested towards. But it also, as Clamatius would be the first to admit, no where near comprehensive. Which just reinforces what a massive investment getting into the PvP scene truly is. It's something the game has never addressed, has always needed to address, and probably never will. But unless you're willing to spend long, frustrating hours getting better, the road into PvP is a rough one, full of trips and traps, and really unfriendly to the uninitiated. Which is a real shame given how wonderful and interesting the Guild Wars PvP system is. Unlike a game such as Tabula Rasa that tries to get chocolate in the peanut butter only to wind up with some other, vastly less flavorful, brown substance, Guild Wars manages to combine some of the better aspects of FPSs and RPGs into fast paced but still strategic combat. But very few people get to that point because of all the hurdles placed in the way. Blame it on the MMO trappings, I guess.

Rage

Just when I think I can get into my head, they pull me back out. Putting the words from the past on hold for a moment because it seems that the Bush administration and the neo-crone hawks are up to their old tricks.



Trying to force through an amendment in the Senate which would basically authorize war with Iran. This is a battle we should have fought five years ago. Let's hope it's a lesson our leaders have learned.

File This Under Looking On The Bright Side

Maybe global warming won't be so bad. At least we'll have the http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070915/ap_on_sc/northwest_passage northwest passage.

The Jap Loves It: This is Even Funnier In Context

I somewhat let my love for this show slip earlier. But, recently, someone clued me into a show called the IT Crowd. I'd heard of it before, especially that it's being imported to the States as a part of what I fear is an increasing trend towards geek chic (Check out, for example, the excerable Big Bang Theory and tremble in mortal fear as your soul is crushed.). It was, perhaps, inevitable, but I'm a little leery about the cultural ascendancy of the nerdcore being co-opted, chewed apart, as the latest fad and then thrown aside for the next big thing (Like, say, luchadores.). Instead of, you know, being a broad-based movement towards a culture that respects expertise and competence and passion instead of vapid ennui. Or at least a way to pawn off playing way too many video games as being cool.

So, I hold out little hope for the American remake. The original British version, on the other hand...

I don't know. It's going to be on NBC, the same network that remade the Office. If you'd asked me up until after the first few shows, I would have said that was a mistake, too. If they can come up with scenes as loopily surreal as that one without simply aping the original scripts then it might be worthwhile.

That scene, by the way, is even better in the course of the episode which begins with Jen, the appealingly down to earth redhead (Unlike the bleached blond goddess that's sure to show up in her place in the American version.), being strangely attracted to the too-small pair of shoes which cause a crippling foot injury. Which explains why she's stalking around barefoot. What it doesn't explain the reasons behind the killer bit about the fire and the boss being so concerned with her stress levels. You can, however, figure those out for yourself as you can see full episodes on YouTube, including the one, “Calamity Jen”, that clip is drawn from.

I have, of course, watched them all by now. I'm not normally one to flout copyright laws so thoroughly but since the series is overseas and unlikely to be released here thanks to the remake, I'm okay with it. Also, I should add, seeing all those episodes has made me much more enthusiastic about the chances of the American remake – good advertising, the way these things can be used for. I should warn, though, in addition to the screwy aspect ration, the second season episodes really go off the rail for me. The first season isn't perfect, either, but the good bits really make up for it. The second one, on the other hand, has really lost me by replacing the boss with his ne'er-do-well son whose diet seems to consist entirely of scenery. Which doesn't work very well since you've already got the blustery set destroying buffoonery of the Irish geek. Victim of its own success? Drawn down creatively by the American exportation? Can't tell but it just doesn't feel quite the same.

Sarah Silverman Is Funny?

Right, the metajoke of Ms. Silverman is that she's an ignorant, clueless, boorish asshole, the feminine version of pretty much anyone in the vaunted Frat Pack. At a certain point, you have to wonder whether she's being bitingly clever or just herself. Because when she doesn't ever break character, the jokes not about her, it's on us.

Eh, it's not my bandwidth and the multimedia experience must be fed, have a clip:

Killer Stuff

Steven Colbert is a national treasure. Proof:

Good Stuff

Moar and bettah pls

Other People Are Better Than Me, An Ongoing Series

Next to my own paltry efforts, other bloggers attempts to sum up the emotion, the atmosphere, of this anniversary day are leagues beyond.

The Real Lesson of 9/11

Bush's, and America's, response to 9/11 was fundamentally flawed for two reasons: It was atavistic and instinctive, and it was based on a distorted, ignorant and bigoted view of the Arab/Muslim world. These two founding errors are qualitatively different: The first involves emotions, the second ideas. But mixed together, they created a lethal cocktail. The grand justification of "spreading democracy in the Middle East" merely provided a palatable cover for vengeance and racism.

Bush's America responded to 9/11 by lashing out. We chose vigilantism over justice, instinct over reason. Bush demanded that America play the role of the angry, righteous avenger, and America followed him. But we were not taking vengeance on the guy who attacked us but on somebody standing on the corner. The war was like the massacre in Haditha on a global scale.

2,974

9/11 has been robbed of its significance. It no longer lights up the neurons recalling an American tragedy, but instead activates that understand political strategy. I hate them for that. So this isn't a 9/11 remembrance. We've never been allowed to forget 9/11. Not for an instant. What we have been allowed to forget is 2,974 individuals who perished in that attack, who didn't die because they wanted to invade Iraq or because they thought Republicans were insufficiently competitive in elections, but because they were murdered. Remember them.

Remember

There are lots of things you can do today.

This Is The Most Awesome Thing I've Yet Seen This Day

Behold, high school students, a camcorder, and a script stitched together from Star Trek and Julius Caesar:

Bonus content. There's a blooper reel, too:

All I have to say is I'm glad I grew up before the age of YouTube. Because that's exactly the sort of thing my friends and I would have done. Remind me to tell you about the fake radio show we did for far too long one of these days...

Conchords Blogging: Be More Constructive With Your Criticism

Yay, Flight of the Conchords is coming back for another season. Love that show. Although, I haven't made mention of it before. Partly because I have to rely on an underground relay of worn VHS (For which I must, in turn, subject myself to the rigors of Top Chef in order to participate. I should probably just find a torrent site and rip the damn things off but, you know, family.) tapes in order to catch an episode but also because, as the wise folks say, you can't blog

about the Conchords. Just can't do it.

Nothing happens in the funniest way possible.

Not Seinfeld “nothing” because that show was at least firing off jokes rapid fire. The Flight of the Conchords, on the other hand, is slow-paced, almost leisurely, as it revels in its ennui. So much so that you'll almost miss the wicked satirical barbs being thrown about. Because the show is as much about the subtle nuance as it is the juxtaposition of the restrained waking life of the characters to the over the top musical numbers.

I mean, take my favorite episode so far, #3 - “Mugged”. You can describe the plot as follows: Brett and Jermaine have a falling out after they're mugged but soon reconcile. But that glosses over everything that makes the episode good. Like the monkey and the thugs who's relationship mirrors the protagonist's own. Or the killer take on the Crocodile Dundee knifey/spooney game. The little touches like the ingenious “camera phone” or the giant swipes of parody like, well, this:

It defies description unless, of course, you want to get all pseudo-intellectual and wring the humor out of it by dissecting just what it is that makes the jokes so funny. No, you can't blog about the Conchords, but what you can do is share the joy through the magic of embedded video players. You can find all sorts of stuff on YouTube of course, but I'll stick to the copyright friendly offerings at the HBO site.

The dead-on parodies contained within the show's musical numbers are especially good fodder. Take, for example, this play on the Lord of the Rings. It's especially apt since the Conchords hail from New Zealand where the series was filmed. And, of course, Jermaine is (non-canon) Figwit.

Then there's the way the band will just capture a musical style, so well. Like this twisted rat pack, Vegas lounge lizard number:

Or a specific artist like this ode to David Bowie:

But, really, what makes these numbers work is the....Conchordy humor that so defeats any attempt to explain it sucinctly. Like the beginning of this one. “She's so hot, it's making me sexist. Bitch.” Boom.

What carries the show, though, are the smaller moments. The ones that don't translate as well to a world of viral clips and instantly memorable moments. But here's a glimpse:

There's just an impressive amount of effort that goes into making it look so easy.

Link Bloggy Never Ends

So much to say, so many tears to shed, so many stories to tell, but I can't find the time. So, instead, I rely on the time-honored secret of the blogger's trade - the link.

I keep meaning to say something about this post at Seven Hells but I can never find the right words. It's been far too long in the petri dish of the intranet's memory, though, and I give up. So, let me just say that I think Mr. Sanders pretty accurately puts a finger on what bothers me so much about what happened with Impulse - how they killed him long before they buried him. And the passing of Mr. Wieringo. It's always sad when hope dies.

This is possibly the coolest web-gadget since LoLFeeds. I've already dashed off about forty featuring the greatest in-joke of all times, Mr. Lloyd “Substance Abuse” Bridges – don't judge, it's funny to me. Like so:

Have your own fun, if you haven't already.

Speaking of video games, this is either the most insidious or clever idea I've ever heard. Asia, by the way, is way ahead of us Westerners when it comes to dealing with the sort of issues raised by a virtual world. I'm just saying.

Shifting gears, entirely, I don't think people realize just how much damage has been done by the current administration. It's even worse than they think. Historically, nothing lasts forever. Even something as grand as America can fade away, ground down by the dusts of time. Because we're not exceptional, just different. Not that we'll feel the effects now, it's what's going to happen in years to come as the world realizes that America is no longer indispensable. That they can and will work around the “crazy uncle” sitting on top of a pile of nuclear weapons and shouting at people until he gets his way. And the real danger is what happens when the US realizes it, too.

To illustrate my last point, here's a link to a view of American politics from someone outside the country. Someone who knows how to make a point well and twist the dagger. In passing, of course, because the post is about the Manufacturing Dissent, a film about Michael Moore than anything else. But when you have someone living in one of my country's greatest allies off-handedly saying that our political system is fundamentally broken and dishonest as if discussing how the grass is green, then we have a problem.

Speaking of the lies we tell ourselves to feel free, yeah, Opus disappeared from my Sunday paper. Now I know why, I guess. You can read the first of two censored strips here (And the other when it's posted). Just...sigh.

And to close on a hopeful note. It's pretty sad that it's come to this, Brownie's Law (scroll down). That the idea that elected officials need to be actually competent and qualified needs to be explicitly stated is just a sign of how far down the drain we've swirled, isn't it? As always, the progressive complaint isn't that we need more things, be that media or regulation or government itself, but that we need more effective things.

Looks like the call to arms on behalf of Mrs. Burner worked. I'd like to think my small contribution helped. And considering that the average donor gave something like $40, I'd have to say it did.

Bond Issues

A terrifying glimpse inside the mind of a Bond's apologist. It's not, though, an uncommon attitude and, as usually, Mr. Yglesias argues the case well.

Just from my usual wanderings around the web, I've seen plenty of others making similar cases. There seem to be some basic, go to arguments when supporting Bond. Reasons why it's okay for Bonds to have juiced up in order to get more millions of dollars for hitting a ball around a patch of grass. Here are the one's I've noted:

1. Steroids weren't illegal/against league policy at the time.
2. Everyone else was juicing, too, so that makes it alright.
3. Baseball wasn't exactly clean in the past.
4. Steroids have no impact on hand-eye co-ordination, they don't help you hit the ball.
5. You're a dirty, dirty racist.

For the first point, I'm pretty sure that by the late 90s, steroids were a controlled substance, on one federal list or another, that meant you couldn't just walk up to the counter and buy them. While you could obtain the substance legally, if you really needed it, you could say the same for morphine or marijuana or any of a number of substances that are “illegal”. For that matter, although the league's steroid policy was toothless, they did, in fact, have a policy against their players using substances. But, okay, say there was absolutely no rule, no law, no guiding statute in place to prevent someone from shooting up with steroids. Does that make it right? Absolutely not because whether or not Bonds was legally justified is a separate issue than deciding whether what he did was right or wrong. It's a question of morality and that exists independently from the laws. Say you're in an anarchist state where there are no laws at all. So, technically, you can just walk up to someone and rob them but does that mean it's okay for you to do so? No, because it's still stealing. And maybe there aren't penalties for what Bond did because the law hasn't caught up to it yet or people just don't care enough. But it doesn't matter because it's still cheating.

The second point, that everyone was juicing so it doesn't matter, wouldn't fly with your pre-school teacher. As she'd tell you, just because everyone is jumping off a bridge, does that mean you should jump, too? Just because many other people are speeding down the highway, does that mean it's legal for you to floor it, too? Next time you get pulled over, try and see if the cop will let you out of a ticket because everyone else was going 90 mph and you were just following the speed of traffic. See how far that gets you. Everyone else speeding doesn't mean it's any more legal or right to speed, just that you're less likely to get caught. There hasn't been a smoking gun, incontrovertible proof, that Bonds used steroids, but he's been caught as red-handed as anyone can be – there are way too many coincidences, way too many opportunities, for him to do so, and the physical results seem to show he did (And don't give me any of that jive about how he didn't know what he was taking. Bonds is a professional athlete, more in tune with his body and his training regimine than 99% of the people out there. He knew what he was doing.). And the fact that there were a lot of other people speeding past as the ticket was being written out, so to speak, doesn't change anything.

The third point, that people have cheated in baseball since time immemorial is, likewise, unconvincing. Just because people have committed wrongs in the past, that means we can't hold anyone accountable now? Laughable. We can't correct old mistakes but that doesn't means we can't police matters in the present. If there have been wrongs committed then they need to be corrected. And we have to start somewhere. Much as I keep hoping, no one's managed to build a time machine yet so we can only deal with the circumstances of the present day.

The fourth point, that steroids don't impact the ability of someone to bat and, therefore, are irrelevant to the records Bonds has set is a bit trickier. For one thing, it's arguably true. Steroids, HGH, and whatever else Bonds might have imported into his blood stream are about bulking up not about improving hand-eye co-ordination. The problem there, though, is that Bonds was already a perfectly good hitter. A great one, in fact, from the time he entered the league. He didn't need to learn how to hit a ball, he needed the power to drive them out of the park. More importantly, steroids help speed recovery from injuries, which sounds like it would very much aid an older player trying to set a record that's about endurance more than anything. Either way, it's a bit of a moot point. Steroids did something to Bonds. That something is appreciable and different from what he would have been like without steroids, even if we can't tell exactly what it was. It doesn't matter exactly what it did, just that the drugs did it. And taking them was wrong. It's still cheating, even if they weren't that great of an advantage.

The fifth is the most troubling. People start accusing you of being Kenesaw Mountain and it's hard to do anything but sputter that you're not. And views on the Bonds issue do break down along racial lines. Whites overwhelmingly disapprove of Bonds. Blacks overwhelmingly support him. Which means not just that the overwhelming majority of people aren't happy with Bonds, but that there's a big, cultural divide here. And it stems from past prejudices and abuses that have sensitized the black community to such practices. I'm not saying that they're tilting at windmills here – I can only say that, for me, personally, it's not about the color of the man's skin nor even the content of his character, it's about whether he cheated or not – and drumming up an issue that doesn't exist. But I will say that the black community has learned that their best defense against such hatred is to scream and moan and circle the wagons. To raise a fuss, to put everyone else on the defensive, because that's the only way they get their views heard. I don't think it's warranted in this case (Or, really, when any multi-millionaire of color goes on trial. Like Michael Jackson or Vick or whoever. But, then, that's about the only time the news pays attention, isn't it? Still, I'd rather see that outrage saved for things like Missing White Girl Syndrome.) but I can see why someone can and would view it through that lens. Just as I'm sure that more than a few people do, in fact, disparage Bonds because of their bigotry. But, again, there's an objective standard here (did Bonds cheat or not?) that I'd hold anyone against – so, yes, I think MacGuire probably cheated as well and should be held in similar contempt - so namecalling doesn't phase me.

So, Mr. Yglesias and others making similar cases get my third Lloyd Bridges “Looks like I picked t week to quit drinking” Memorial Award (My second went out the other day when someone said impeachment was a tactically poor decision. But evil Scribefire ate that post and about a half dozen others that I don't have the time or desire to rewrite at the moment. Hence, it shall remain lost to the mists of time, for now.) for depressing me enough to seek self-medication. Take it away, Mr. Bridges:

Says it all, really.

I Would Completely Read This

Huh. I thought, as the e-king, I had an impressively aggrandizing handle. But, no, the self-proclaimed Mighty God King has me beat. Hands down.

He (And I'm just playing the percentages here. And the gender bias inherent in calling yourself a male monarch.) also thinks he'd do a bang up job of writing the Legion of Super-Heroes. I'm inclined to agree with him. There's a petition, too, if you're likewise inclined.

I should mention that I kinda sorta enjoy the current version – if only for a decently written Super Girl (Although I hear her own title might have turned the corner. Finally.). And that, for the most part, the Legion is one of those areas of comicdom that makes me ball up in a corner and weap because although I understand people find it beautiful, I, myself, can only see a ball of clay on a pedestal. In other words, it's nice enough but I just don't get the hardcore devotion. Just passed me by during the right developmental stage, I guess.

Anyways, on to the real reason for this post: the pet theories. I do so love untangling the threads of a well plotted opus.

But, anyway, there are two big mysteries in the Mighty one's outline. The first is how Naltor, the homeplanet of Dream Girl, and full of pre-cogs (And, yeah, minus geek points for me, I had to look that up.), managed to be destroyed. The second is the tantilizing question of just who the Empire of D are.

Both of which, I think, are solved by contextual clues provided elsewhere within the proposal. For the first, one of the other ideas mentioned is Schrodinger's Army. Which, as any armchair game theorist could tell you is a takeoff of the famous Schrodinger's Cat – the one that's in a closed box and you can't tell if it's alive or not until you open it up and take a look. That collapses the waveform of probability and determines which cat you, in fact, have been holding all along. Basic quantum physics. And it's the sort of thing you might read in the paper and get a cool idea off of, I imagine, I know I have. But it's also mentioned as a one-off idea, so maybe I'm on the wrong track here. Still, I think the only way you can get past the power of precognition, of a planetary gift of prophecy would be to mess with probabilities like that. So maybe it's not the Schrodinger's Army that attacked Naltor, but whoever's behind them. A trial run for their technology, that sort of thing.

The Empire of D is trickier. But I think it's hidden right there in plain view, too. Part of the proposal is to show what happened to Gorilla City (Now, that one, I know without having to look it up.). Which apparently left Earth some time ago to become some kind of interstellar nomads. One of whom goes on to join the Legion. Ah, but what if there were a more compelling reason for that space-ape to join than it simply being a matter of being too cool not to? If those are nomadic decedents from Gorilla City are the peaceful apes, what about what happened to, say, Gorilla Grodd?

I refuse to believe the mind that brings us the Last Will and Testament of the Space Cabby brings us Gorilla City without a healthy dose of Groddly goodness. Although, I don't get where the name – Empire of D - comes from. Except from maybe the extra 'd' in Grodd? Which would be...weird... but could work.

Then again, I could be completely wrong. But that's the fun of this kind of thing. A bit of harmless speculation about the threads I see being woven into a pattern I might recognize is a sign of how interested I am in those threads. I don't want to wait, don't want them to play out, I want to jump ahead and know what's going on. So, yes, I agree with the sentiments expressed here. Artistic works are not solely the property of the creator nor are they completely driven by pleasing the audience. They're, at their best, a dialog between the two. An interaction. An unequal one, to be sure, with just how much depends on the medium. But it's definitely a transaction of some kind being made. People trying to flip to the last page of the book are a good sign.

It's Official: Goth is Dead

I cannot seem to escape this song, lately:

Everywhere I go. Clubs, internet radio, friend's house, it's there waiting to suck. Worse, I've heard it often enough that it's starting to grow on me. Like mold.

When I first heard it, I thought it was part of a musical. Some off-broadway stuff loosely based on WhiteWolf or something. But, nope, Eurovision.

I imagine people in Europe view Eurovision the way I do, say, American Idol. Which is to say, with the sick fascination of a car wreck. But from this vantage point it's wonderfully, seriously fucked up stuff.

I'd Cook Tiramisu All the Time, If I Could

Superbad fever. Have you caught it yet? If not, here, comedy goodness to stuff into your eyeballs until your mind is overflowing with happy:

I haven't been this geeked about a movie since Wet Hot American Summer. Which featured the almost reunion of the State (Someone, somewhere, is getting me those DvDs, I don't care how.). And was, literally, like watching awesome distilled onto celluloid.

I don't know, maybe it's because I can readily identify with the antics of some painfully awkward teenagers. Or maybe it's because this is another production from Apatow's murderer's row (Murderers as in comedy. As in “I killed on stage” and....oh, forget it.) the same folks who brought us the 40 Year Old Virgin and Knocked Up. Maybe it's the residual halo effect from Arrested Development. But this movie looks to be not just good but an instant classic. The source of a thousand in-jokes and memes which will spread across the internets. Like 300 except, you know, stemming from a work with actual artistic merit. It'll be a watershed event. A way of separating the in from the other as every conversation will include some veiled references to the film. Those who want to retain their geek cred will be expect to quote chapter and verse on demand lest they face the horrible questioning of, “Dude, are you gay?”. Whole subcultures, future civilizations will be founded on the wisdom contained within this ephemeral piece of early 21st century culture. Those who view it first run will be witness to history in the making. Their grandchildren will ask them about it and they'll speak of it in hushed tones of reverence.

In other words, I'm really quite looking forward to this one.

August 17th. We will all be McLovin soon.

I'm Killroy: It's Been A While

Goes to show how long it's been since I've posted but I didn't even remember switching my header tag. It's not a case of someone playing silly buggers since it's there in my notes. As you can see yourself, I did indeed follow this directive to myself “Change tag to CAST IN THE NAME OF GOD. YE NOT GUILTY.” I just have no recollection of it.

Now, I like this tag because it's a sneaky one. It sounds vaguely religion and, having a blog called the Cult of Evolution, I am aware of the subtext there. However, it's not even remotely religious. It's lifted from the anime series, the Big O. Man, I miss that show.

Clippage:

Sadly forgotten by now, at the time it came out, it was a revelation. For me, at least. Done by the same animation team that did the animated Batman series (No, not the current one which I've heard has much improved. But considering where it started that might not be saying much. No, I'm talking about the mid 90s from the Timm-verse.) the show is what would happen if you tossed giant battling robots into that version of the Dark Knight. It's got the same kind of retro noir sensibility and art direction. The lead character was a dead ringer for Bats, it's just he jumped into the pilot seat of a ten story tall robot instead of putting on a cape and tights. And like B:TAS, and unlike a lot of the anime flooding the market at the time, it had a very Western attitude towards characterization. In that it actually had some.

There are only two seasons of the show, thanks to the Cartoon Network (Back when they actually cared about putting good anime on the air. And not completely enthralled to Williams Street who are apparently out to prove how cool they are by insulting their viewers.). It's one of the rare examples of an anime show failing in the Japanese market but being renewed because of success here, in America. But the first season was a hit on the CN and they ordered another which showed up a few years later, promising to wrap up some dangling threads from the first.

Still have no idea about the underlying mystery of the show, though, since it really jumped the tracks at the end. The whole weird premise of the show was that at some point in the future everyone lost their memory. Except they kinda didn't. Except they really did. And then it was all make believe and giant stagelights were falling from the air. Like I said, absolutely no clue what the point of that story was. Still a great show, though.

Before I go, one more gem from the YouTube vaults. Big O set to “Mr. Roboto”:

It's Being Brought

Yesterday, the President delivered his latest stunning fuck you to the legal system. Demonstrating, again, his contempt for the rule of law just days before the most patriotic of holidays.

And yesterday I recalled that it was also the anniversary of his infamous quote:

There are some who feel like -- that the conditions are such that they can attack us there. My answer is, bring them on. We've got the force necessary to deal with the security situation. [Emphasis mine.]

Possibly not the stupidest thing to pass through out great leader's lips but certainly the one that most encapsulates his boundless arrogance.

Well, I've tried all day to think of an appropriate response. To someone weave the correct words, the properly scathing tone, and the sheer emotional fury wholecloth into a post for the ages. But ever time I've tried to set those words to paper, I've failed miserably. I just can't do it. I lack the will. I lack the talent. I lack the energy to rail once more against the iron wall of indifference and apathy.

But that's okay. Because I'm not the only one who heard the call. And there are some others who are hurling the lightning bolts from the bare reaches of the soul that I just can't manage. Here are some of my favorites:

Mr. Greenwald works the head.

Mr. Horton works the body.

And, as ever, what Digby said.