I Got a Swollen Hip Hop Gland

The square root of negative one geek cred points to you if you catch the reference in the title. For the rest of you, I'll see you outside in the parking lot.

Feeling much more on the upswing today. I think I figured out what's been bothering me - if not how to fix it yet. But I've been having some credit card difficulties lately. Now, I hate credit on general principles. It's the old Scotch Irish in me but I don't like spending money I don't have. Especially not when I'm unsure if I'll be able to pay it back in time - been burned more than once by interest hikes and late fees and the like because I am absolutely horrid with my money. Like a friend once told me, "You better get rich soon because you spend money like a trust fund kid who doesn't give a shit." Which, you know, is nice if you're rich. Not so nice if you're fucking broke and living paycheck to paycheck.

I digress, but about the only time I really use my credit cards beyond the odd online purchase or something is during the holidays. Which is, by the way, the only time I really spend more money than I have at the moment - again, it's that old Scotch-Irish pride but I can't get people shabby gifts and I'll run my debt up just to avoid disappointing them. But this year I found out that one of my cards had been discontinued, disabled, or otherwise rendered unusable. Turns out it was from a company I thought I had closed out a long time ago but still had a balance on. Here's how they got me: I sent them a check in the mail but in the few days it took for it to get there a few cents of interest accrued and the check wasn't enough to cover it. End of the billing cycle hits and, bam, they pile on like thirty dollars in fees. The conveniently forget to inform me, somehow, while locking out my online statement so when I go to check I think the card's just been torn up on both of our ends. Another month goes by and another round of fees. Pretty soon they're calling me up and demanding I pay a hundred or so dollars on top of what I already gave them to settle my account before. At this point I feel like I'm in some kind of gangster movie, I just want to sit down to some nice pasta with this company and go, "Now...what is it *sniff* that I have to do to get you people to go away for good?"

So, today I found out that my latest check never got there. Even though I sent it two weeks ago, "Oh, sir, you know that because of how we sort our mail it takes about five to ten business days for it to get into our system." So they're going to nail me for another round of late fees. Fucking-a! Since this all stems from late fees about a purchase I'm fairly certain I never made in the first place - some $10~15 charge in a place I'd never make it (Challenged it and all but no dice) - and it's now wound up costing me more than 10 times that amount I'm getting pretty amused by the whole thing. I mean, it's either laugh or cry at this point and I've picked the option that's kindest to my blood pressure. Everything I've read and everyone I've talked to says, basically, I'm fucked and I'm on the hook for all these fees until and unless I can get their mail schedule and mine to sync up and zero out my balance. Maybe, I'm told, if I'm a big jerk and raise a giant fuss I can talk the amount down some.

Anyway, with this looming financial crisis hanging over my head it's no wonder that I've been a bit tense lately. I'm sure the bill will come due sooner or later but, at this point, I've reached the acceptance stage and I'm just rolling with it. Having passed through that looking glass, though, I'm finding myself a lot more creative - like the weight's off my shoulders and I'm running free again. In fact, depending on just how industrious I get there just might be something big in the offing tonight.

No promises, though. Because if anything kills a post it's talking about it before it goes live.

Outlook: I've developed a bit of a potty mouth. I'm rather pleased at this occurence.

[1] - 30 minutes! Shit, I'm slipping.