I Need A Vacation From My Vacation

It's almost my birthday and I'm having an existential crisis. You know, looking around my life and wondering where it all went...well, I wouldn't exactly say wrong since even the tragedies have led to the choices which have become the triumphs. But, you know, I realized over my morning cereal today that it's been nearly a year since my cat died and almost six months since my dog passed and I still miss them. And how not very far off from where I was when those sad days attempted to jar me from my rut. That sort of thing.

In short, I'm rather out of it and I'd expect me to become really lazy about things in very short order some time soon. Not saying I'm going to stop posting while I hunt down a remote woodland hut to meditate in while wearing a tinfoil helmet or anything but I have been known.

Today, though, I managed to put aside my imaginary expansion set that's been so captivating me lately in order to hammer out another update for the List. Which is now getting capitalized because I need to personify my hatred for what my past selves got me into. It's got some corrections and a new section and blah blah blah selfpromotioncakes.

Honestly, though, I've seen people linking it and using it and I've managed to track some interesting referrals and nothing could tickle me more. It's, you know, nice to see the work I've put into it being appreciated. I'm just not in a good mood at the moment. Spending a half hour trying to figure out which misplaced bracket was screwing the damn thing up hasn't helped, by the way.

Speaking of those new cards that I've been working on so diligently for a while now, they're really rounding into form. I finally took the time today to set them all out in a spreadsheet where I could play around with the numbers because they're past the point of being interesting concepts and half-hearted designs and into the stage where there are concrete values that need balancing (I know, I'm insane. It's wonderful, isn't it?). Not every card is working as well as I'd want but every card has its stats and a unique innate and four distinct skills and it's a matter of figuring out how to make the ideas work and the numbers feel right. But the design is there and, mostly, I think they're at least interesting and some are even pretty strong.

Also, I was joking before about heading off to make up some items but, apparently, my muse wasn't listening. Haven't gotten all 20 yet (I'm skipping adding any new general items although it's tempting) and the ones I do have are sketchy at best but they're coming along. I'm proud of one, for example, that procs a burning DOT if the range is set to a certain distance. It should work beautifully with one of my cards whose skill list goes berserk when that DOT is in play - but I think it's still fair because the proc happens at one range while the card is better played at the opposite.

Putting it all down in a spreadsheet, though, brought some things to my attention that I hadn't noticed before. Especially in comparison to the existing cards. My cards, for example, average 68hp and 3/2.5/2 resist (Well, okay, those are the median values for resists. The averages get weird because, well, I've done something really cool or really stupid that makes the averages rather messy.). While the original cards are at 70, 2.5/1.5/2.

When it comes to innates, I've got a lot more that focus on raw damage improvement and energy engines. Nearly half of them, in fact. Almost half of them, in fact. While, in the original, the most numerous were what I call "armor innates". Those that, like Ashi's imperviousness to stuns protect a card from something. I'm much more likely to make things difficult than I am to just rip away some part of the game - although since I also tried to make sure none of my innates was duplicating existing ones (I mean, sure, I ripped off a few. I've got one that's Ubuntu's with the serial numbers filed off. One that works on energy costs just at a different part of the combat round.) and the original cards covered those bases, perhaps it's not as surprising. Also showing up strongly in my cards were innates that centered around healing. Which makes sense considering I've got a line of priests wandering around being defensively lame.

When it comes to skills, I'm much less fond of multiplicative skills (XxY) that the original. Skills that cost more than 50 energy, too. Although I suspect both of those to change as I try to balance it all out. It's easy to tone the power of a skill by splitting its damage into different packets - makes it weaker by bumping into resistance more, makes it easier to creep up the power by adding in more damage, too. And, I think, in general, I've been pretty generous with skills and the costs could creep up so I'll get a few more 70~80 heavies in there somehow. One thing, though, is that my cards tend to have fewer attacks. Most cards in the original are loaded with attacks - averaging about 3 each. Mine hover around 2, with the rest being filled up with buffs and debuffs. Since I'm working on a set that rewards more skillful play and I think effective use of juggling buffs and debuffs is one of the signs of a skilled player, I find that fitting. There are also several cards in the original that are restricted to a single range. Either by, like Ashi, having no options or, like Andie, having laughable ones. I've, however, tried to make sure that every card has at least something to do if they're stuck at a certain range. Some cards are designed to get to a certain range but everyone has something useful to do besides hit the rest button - and most have at least some way of causing some damage in their off-range.

Just weird, I guess, and the sort of thing you don't plan for or notice until you look at the grand weave. But, really, I think it's pretty much the way I would have gone if I'd been thinking about it in the first place.

I Am Berry, Berry Lazy

Ah, I'm still in the middle of my post Frenzy idyll. But I'm starting to feel the stirrings of my vaunted creative impulses once more. I've done some thinking about my comic script, for example, and I'm thinking of going back to tighten some things up. Or doing that revision of last year's Frenzy movie script that I keep putting off.

But, for today, besides taking a final, I spent the day watching the Pistons keep their switch on and writing up some Kongai stuff that's been kicking around in my head (Oh yes, expect content. Not anytime soon, though, since I've just jinxed myself. The surest way to not post something is to mention that you're going to...sigh.) when I wasn't fiddling around with the test version of the new and improved Card List. Which isn't really as impressive as it sounds when you realize that I forget basic html just as soon as I learn it. But I've been getting some interesting incoming links off of it so don't worry, it hasn't been forgotten. Just - like most other things - put on hold while I burned off those last vestiges of adrenaline and took a slightly deserved rest.

I got sidetracked, though, into coming up with my own imaginary expansion for Kongai. Word on the digital street (Okay, now, what was going through my head reading through that entire interview was "But what about Tafari?". No bad cards, my ass.) is that there will, one day, be new card packs released. In so many words, new groups and characters and items to slot into the game. A particularly intriguing rumor says the long development time means that there's at least a few out there just waiting in the wings to be pumped out after release. And, well, I thought "What the hell? How hard can it be?"

Famous last words. And my results weren't anything like polished enough to, you know, actually share since I fear people finding out I'm not really as smart as they think I am. And Furbies. Still have nightmares about those little fuckers. But it was an interesting intellectual exercise, if nothing else, that's taught me a lot about what it is that makes a card work. I came up with a pretty interesting assortment of characters spread over four groups from the powerful but lumbering Monstrous Beasts to the quick and crafty Elementals to the deceptively deadly Undead and the supportive buff-happy Zealots. I'm particularly proud of Redgore, the Flame Spirit who - if this makes sense - is like a mirror Le Morte who's a brutal but high-burner card who's main mechanic is creating and getting supercharged by Burning debuffs (That's really something I like that's not in the game much, at the moment. The problem with Ambush is that it's too inflexible, not that it has a setup move. But there's plenty of space for moves that get better or even that you can only use if some precondition has been met.).

Now? Items!

If Al Gore Is Wrong, I Don't Want To Be Right

My production chain has really broken down lately, hasn't it? The vast production - mostly involving mythical pixies whom I've bribed into typing my thoughts for me - which results in piping hot content for this blog, I mean. It's failed, utterly and miserably. Sorry.

Checking the site's stats, amazingly, I seem to have avoided driving all of my readership off with yet another unexplained absence. Apparently, I have conditioned my small yet loyal set of followers to expect that I am utterly unreliable. And, no doubt, shifty and lazy, as well. I am inordinately proud of this accomplishment.

In my defense, I've been sick. Really sick. Not sure if it's down to the recent warm snap around these parts. There were days last week when the mercury climbed above 60. Which is pretty freaking unusual and I used it as an opportunity to take down my meager holiday decorations. After that, though, it was days spent roiling in bed in squishy, sweaty pain and fitful nights spent in fevered half-dreamings. Hasn't been pleasant, in other words. And while it wasn't enough to stop me from heading to work and school and some other responsibilities, it put sitting at a keyboard and trying to collect my thoughts on a blurry screen far out of my mind.

So, not dead. Just resting and recovering.

Should be better now, should be able to get back on track. Although I can't say we'll be returning to your regularly scheduled blogging. Instead, I think it's time to unveil my Plan going forward. The one I've been hinting around at for [weeks now.

In short, while I like this whole blogging thing, I've been reconsidering how I go about it. I've been doing it for over a year now, after all, and I think it's time to start getting smarter instead of simply working harder to get through my problems. Plus, a lot of other things are sucking up my attention so, basically, I'm going to be cutting back. A few less days of dozens of posts. But a few more with at least one detailed, hopefully thoughtful, post. Like the ones that I travel to other blogs to read, the kind that I remember long after I've walked away from the browser. The kind that I'm, you know, ever so slightly proud of having written. The kind I used to write more of. But which I seem to have abandoned in favor of throwing a lot at the wall to see what sticks.

So, that's the plan, in detail. At least one good post a day. Maybe the occasional day - like today (I've got something of a backlog of posts that I'd like to have made in the past week or so to work through, after all) - when I'll go off. The weekends will probably be see me go quieter if not absent altogether. I could string out a bunch of (long winded, rambling) posts about the why and the how of it but, well, that's not how I'm rolling at the moment.

Won't last forever because, hey, nothing does. But it might not last long, either. We'll see how it goes. Because, after all, in the end that's all we can do.

Happy Happy

Happy New Year everyone. Stopping in for a quick bit before I head out to watch the Rose Bowl with some friends.

Just finished watching Michigan pull out the game against Florida in the Capitol One. And, well, it's bittersweet but at least Coach Carr gets to go off on a high note. That's exactly the kind of game, though, that had people thinking this was a team you could pencil in for the championship. Everything worked. That game was a lot closer than it could have been. The Wolverines survived three killer turnovers. Two within sight of the goal line where they could have, at least, settled for field goals. Two by Mike Hart who never fumbles. I mean never. And he put the ball on the turf twice in one game? But Henne played like the quarterback he's been all along. Manningham was lights out. And the defense played like they had nothing to lose. And just, wow, it's the kind of game that makes you think if only, you know?

Also, managed to pop in game and pick up my Wintersday hats. Only two this year, one for Grenth and Dwayna, instead of the four we had last year. Both are pretty good looking, if you ask me. The first is the award winning crown from an art contest. The second is an homage to Scandinavians and their strange love of putting open flames near flammable objects. Like the hair on a young woman's head, for example.

Managed some epic win streaks the other day, too, so now my skills are, in fact, mad. Hopefully, I'll have a chance to get in game again for some last minute madness and to grab some pics. And we'll be back with some real content before long. But, for now, here's some beer and some grilled food with my name on it calling out to me.

The Ball and Its Dropping

Long time no blog. I know, I know. Consider me duly castigated. Had to take my brother to the west in order to make the flight which saved him a non-Geico bundle. And once I was done, I decided to visit some friends in Chicagoland and you know how it goes.

I'm back home now, left-overs from the family get-to-gether still safe and sound in the crisper. I look forward to endless days of turkey sandwiches and turkey nachos and, by the end, turkey ice cream and no doubt other gastronomic abortions visited upon my digestive tract in the name of frugality. Hate throwing that stuff out, you know?

Anyhow, we managed to have a white Christmas. Barely, thanks to the lingering piles of snow not quiet managing to melt before the day of some people's savior's birth. But I seem to have returns to a world of mud and muck. The sky is gray. The land is brown. Just cold enough to melt. Just warm enough not to freeze. A storm threatens to upset this uneasy equilibrium but, for now, it's dreary and dire and, fortunately, I have plenty of new books to get warm and cozy with.

I have, for the past few days, been working on a guide, of sorts, to the Snowball Fights. Why, I'm not really sure except a lingering desire to help others. Instead of, you know, writing off the rest of the human race as a loss. Just one of those goals I set out to meet by the year's end.

Of course, another goal was to get my next Gamer rank. And my past few days of idle meant I've slid well behind my pace. So, we're in the classic "write about the game or play the game instead of writing about it" dilemma here and I think you know which way this is going here.

I'm something like 600 points away from my admittedly meaningless title. But, hey, when you think about it like that, what's ever really worth anything? It's all memories of fleeting light. And, if you'll excuse me, with over half a hundred victories to pound out before the close of the year, I've got some memories to make.

Until next year everyone. Stay safe, stay sound, and stay happy.

Yule Tidings

Once again, I hope your holiday was as pleasant as mine. Things went rather well around here. From our annual tradition, the petards de fete, I managed to land an aquatic Derringer; the smallest water pistol known to man. At first, I dared not part with it. One never knows when one will find oneself in a heated water gun battle, after all, in these troubled days. But I wound up trading for a pair of round dice that will take up a position of honor in my Crown Royal bag. I could tell you more stories, like the search for the elusive Oxygen Bomb or how my sister made my mother cry. But for now, though an emergency trip to Chicago has been called in order to get my brother to his (incredibly cheap) there on time for his connecting flight to a place where the temperature doesn't hover around freezing. And I have not the time nor the inclination for more. Not sure if I'll be able to get much up for the next few days but, hey, it's the holidays.

Before I Go...

Quick update on the neighbor situation. Talked with a detective today and unless the idiot next door wants to pursue it further or do something else moronic then that will probably be the last of it. I've moved from being upset, from losing sleep over the thought of someone waking me or my loved ones up in the middle of the night, to just being angry about it all. But as much as I'd like to, I think it's best just not to make a big deal of this. Keep it from escalating. Let cooler heads prevail and be the better man by being generous and forgiving. The reports have been filed, the authorities notified and, if it happens again, the hammer will come down. But, for now, time to put it behind me.

I'm about to head off to the annual Christmas Eve party. There's a small gathering of the immediate family before the much larger event tomorrow. With all the festivities I'm not sure I'll be around much. And what with having new toys to play around with or new books to read, I'm not sure that I'll be up to writing much if I am. So, if I don't have a chance to tomorrow, let me just wish anyone fortunate to be reading this the happiest of holidays. Enjoy yourself, your friends, your family, or whatever it is that makes you happy in peace.

Of Doors and Dogs Now Gone

Oh man, exhausted. Been run ragged the past few days with chores as we get the old homestead ready for the relatives' visit. Things have been polished and buffed, ornaments have been hung by the stockings. At this point, I really don't care if that makes sense or not just so long as it's done. Not to mention that I've also had to buffet myself in the vast seas of unwashed humanity as I bravely venture into the retail experience because I still don't have all my holiday shopping done - just have my mother to go but she's annoyingly difficult to shop for.

Anyhow, I'm not just drained physically but emotionally as well. Today, as part of the repairs I've been making around mother's home, the small to middling maintenance things that she needs her big strapping son to provide, I put up some insulation over the big glass door that leads to the backyard. The one that we don't use much anymore now that the dog's gone. So to save a few dollars and to keep a bit warmer, it's now been sealed up. Won't make much of a difference since no one's likely to want to go outside much and there are plenty of other ways to get there but, yeah, it made me think about my deceased pet yet again. And that wound is still fresh enoughto put me in a black mood.

It's hard to escape it, though, because it's the holidays. Her name was Prancer. And, as you might imagine, she was a Christmas present from a time when me and my many siblings still cared about what was under the tree or about when, exactly, it would be permissible to wake our parents up instead of how late we could sleep in and still stumble to the family dinner in time for the gorging. And we didn't just name her because of the song but because of the way she used to walk. How when she was small and little she'd, well, prance around the backyard. Lifting her paws up proud and high to make her bouncy way through the snow. We thought it was hilarious. Thought everything she did was cute and precious. Back when she was just a puppy, of course. But this time of year was always her time. She was the sort of dog who loved the snow. Loved to run and play and toss it up in the air and snap at it - eternally surprised at the cold. In that same backyard that I've now closed off. In that same backyard where I spent those painful moments in the warm sun realizing that, just like the day, her time was drawing to a close. The sun was warm and golden that day. The breeze full of the gentle promise of fall. You couldn't have asked for a nicer day. But I would have liked for her to have lived long enough to see the backyard full, once more, of snow. She always liked it and I think she would have enjoyed one last walk with the ground frozen beneath her paws.

So, yeah, that's the kind of thoughts that have been buzzing around my mind today whenever I've had time enough to stop and let them brood. Which, fortunately, hasn't been very often. Just busy and with a last weekend to go before the Christmas we've been preparing for it doesn't promise to get any less hectic. Always something to do at the last minute, some last errand I'll have to run. Have to pick up my brother at the airport tomorrow, for example, and his flight supposedly lands in the middle of the night, at time even the airport calls "Officially Too Fucking Early". I suspect it might be a bit hit or miss around here until after that's all over with.

Also, Wintersday unfolds tomorrow and that's sure to suck up some of my free time as well. I am fully prepared to spend a lot of time enjoying myself. Which I am going to do even if I'm not having any fun doing it, dammit! But I do plan to get in as many rounds as I can. Make a good push on my gamer track in the next few weeks. Blow off some steam. That sort of thing. Since I never got around to putting up a guide last year I should have some things to put up about it, too. But, until then.

It's All About the Metaphors, Baby!

The much promised blogging renaissance which Brinstar has cleverly deduced is sadly going to be delayed once again. Although, I like to think you can already see some hints of it already. Don't know if taking some time of has resulting in renewed spirits or a pent up need for bloviation but I think I'm churning out some solid stuff lately. More importantly, for me - at least - I seem to be, well, thinking again. It's hard to explain because, you know, try to express your inner thought processes sometimes, but I can tell when my mind's active and engaged and when I'm, for lack of a better term, just praying at the altar of inspiration like cargo cultists at a bamboo airport. Still, ch-ch-changes in the works once I actually figure out exactly what they are.

But not today because not only did I get wrapped up in planning for my latest novel project I also got wrapped up in playing Mythos. Or, rather, not playing. There's been a new patch with a bunch of promising features (Including respeccs. Yes! I mean, so much for the lengthy rant I have on my harddrive comparing respeccs in Mythos to refund points in Guild Wars and attempting to prove the benefits of beginner friendly mechanics to erase mistakes in games aimed at the casual market. There's, you know, no need to finish that off now but it's worth it to no longer be trapped by past choices.) that I'd like to talk about. But, I don't know, I feel this strange need to actually play a game before I discuss it. At least once or twice, you know?

And, try as I might, I'm still stuck on the outside. Same error as before 8-2449 or whatever it is that means there's some problem with my non-existent firewall. Because I've disabled everything, scrubbed my computer clean, followed every suggestion and bit of advice I could find in the wide net I've cast through the interwebs and, basically, exposed myself - however briefly - like a flasher at a nudist colony, to all manner of hackers, viruses, and computer related boogymen. And all for nothing. I don't get it. I feel really annoyed that I don't get it. And I'm about one step away from forswearing all technology and moving to a shed in the woods with a manual typewriter to see if I can't get into the Kaczynski wing of almni at my alma mater. But, no, I'm sad to say I'm not going to become the Unicode Bomber just yet. Just that I wasted a bunch of precious time banging my head against the wall when I could have been writing. Or drawing. Or dancing. Or singing the songs that I like to sing. Watching Scarface about fifty times. Something, anything, other than proving the depths of my ignorance, in other words.

Not giving up on the game just yet because, man, I really want to play and not being able to is whetting my appetite more than any number of previews or testimonials. Which is probably a bad thing as the game I'm building up in my mind is going to cure dandruff and pop into the kitchen to make me a sandwich afterwards by the time I'm done. Setting myself up for disappointment since it can never live up to my self-induced hype, in other words.

Trey day until the Snowballs get rolling, too. I will be standing in line, anxiously awaiting the hour. But much to do before then.

Holy crap, I actually spelled Kaczynski right first go.

I Hate Shoveling Snow

I'm home, again, for the holidays. It's not much of a change for me. But it does mean that I'm in the old family house where I grew for the first time since my childhood dog died. And it's, well, it's strange. With the cat also gone from earlier in the year, it's the first time in as long as I've been alive that my mother has absolutely no pets at all to call her own. There's an emptiness to it. Like a hole. A stillness, a silence, like the noise you've only noticed because it's stopped. Doors open that would have been closed. Bowls, beds, that had held their place for years gone and, knowing my mother, stored away. And, yeah, I kinda wish she was around because it's a lonely place without that presence of another living thing.

Going to be a sucky Christmas this year, I think. But preparations are well underway. Furniture has been polished, carpets steamed, walls washed as we ready for the rest of our family to descend on us like a swarm of locusts hungry for appetizers. It's just going to be weird because we've finally gotten to the point where we've split to the winds. Enough having moved on, moved elsewhere, or otherwise gone through life changing events that what I think of as the whole family just isn't going to be there. But my brother will be, having hopefully made the flight from the coast if the weather permits, so there's that at least.

As for how things went in-game last night, I think I did alright. Got all four of the characters I was trying to get through GW:EN through most of the Asuran cycle. Didn't quite manage to get it done before exhaustion and a cranky internet connection made me quit for the night but everyone's through Gadd's and Oola's and a few are up to the annoying GOLEM mission where you have to defend two points from a Destroyer assault (There is, of course, a trick to it if you're trying to hench it. If you skip talking to the quest guy at the start you scan slip out the side and take on the Destroyers who are standing around waiting politely to start tearing into your flesh with their molten claws and wipe them out before the starting bell rings. You have to deal with a few more charging into your base afterwards but it's not as hard as it is otherwise. Beats how I wound up doing it with my Monk, anyway. Which was, namely, to bring two Paras, a Monk Hero, three offensive henchies - I forget which but I'm guessing Talon and Zho, and, uh, someone who isn't Cynn, I hope, along with another Monk. Flagging the Heroes in one spot and the henchies in the other and then running back and forth between the two as needed. Post LoD-nerf, too, so I think I was doing some kind of prot/heal thing that wasn't really very effective.). They've all got all the Charr and Norn stuff out of the way and that just least a few quests and the Heart of the Shiverpeaks and the final confrontation with the Great Destroyer. Considering I only got a few hours, stolen in bits and pieces over the course of the event, I'll live with it.

I'm not in any great hurry to continue and get it done, either. I think, instead, that it's time to work on tracking down some of those PvE skills - the Ebon Vanguard wards look promising for my Ele, for one, and I must have Pain Inverter on everything or I feel like less of a man. Or I could go back and work on some other things like hard mode or protector tracks or rep grinding or what have you. At the moment, though, I think I'm going to take a break and rest up in advance of what's sure to be a ton of playtime during Wintersday.

In news of other projects that, very likely, only I really care about, here's how things are going on the next novel. I'll admit I've been slacking off the past week or so thanks to everything going on. And since we're on the slow to glacial pace I move at on my own, that means I'd been pretty well stalled out. But it's never been very far from my thoughts. I want to do this and I'm building up to it. I'm going to jot down some thoughts once I get done here, in fact, and that should put preproduction back on track.

I've also discovered that the Script Frenzy is scheduled this year for April instead of June. Which is just awful for me as I anticipate being insanely busy then instead of being in the lull of a summer vacation with nothing better to do than crank up the AC and write my brains out. But with only four months to plan, I need to start generating something like an idea of what to write.

Also, I was talking to my aunt the other day. She's one of those people who volunteers to help out with elections. The staff at the poling places who...do whatever it is the staff at those places do when they're not, in my experience, standing around looking disinterested and passing out stickers like you gave blood or something (Which is not, I repeat, not to say that I think those people are doing something less than a necessary and important bit of civic duty. Just that it's governmental work and, as usual, it features a lot of inefficiency.). Once it became a trainwreck I pretty much stopped paying attention to it.

Long story short, the Democratic side of things doesn't matter because the national committee are being a bunch of pricks, half the candidates have pulled out, and the in-state members of the party are split about what, exactly, they're trying to accomplish here. So, you know, politics as usual and actually going out and voting in it will be even more inconsequential than usual because your vote, literally, won't really count. The Republicans are motoring on and thanks to the peculiarities of the Michigan system, it's an open primary and practically anyone can vote in the one of their choice. Meaning, I think, that a lot of Dems are going to forget about their own contest to muddy the water for their opponents (It's how we wound up going for McCain in 2000, after all.) rendering that decision pointless as well. I'm tempted to do it myself but, honestly, at this point I can't stomach the idea of approving any of the Republican candidates even as a "least objectionable" choice. I think I'd go to pull the lever and it would melt away from my hand or something.

But she reminded me that, hey, Michigan's holding its primary in, like, four weeks. And I should probably start paying attention. she says the big thing now is absentee ballots. Namely, that because the date was moved up the election officials might not be able to get all the ballots out and back in time for them to be properly counted. Lots of scrambling and CYA going on, in other words. And it's just one more big mess in what's increasingly become a series of mistakes. But, hey, our primary system is broken and we need to fix it and if this helps then I'm all for it.

I Fail At Blogging Regularly

Things I have learned this week:

• Having a backlog of posts doesn't help unless you actually post them.
• You shouldn't say you have a backlog of posts unless said backlog does not include spelling and structural errors which will take so much time to correct that you might as well just rewrite them.
• Editing is harder than it looks.
• It's much easier to not post if you haven't the day before.

You'd think I'd have learned all that already but, judging by my exams so far, I need to relearn a lot of things. Unfortunately, next week doesn't look much better. And I'm out the door once again.

Realistically speaking, the whole month is going to be like this. Don't say you haven't been warned.

Hell Week

I caution you that blogging might be...intermittent for a little bit. We're in the middle of a hectic week for me. We're gearing up for finals in my classes. And with the holidays approaching there's plenty to be done around the house. And all the things I set aside during the mad dash towards the finish line during November are coming past due. While I want to get some other projects of my own off the ground. Might not have enough time to sit around and type out my thoughts, is what I'm saying. And if I drop out of sight for a while now you know why. I should, though, have enough content queued up that you won't notice the difference. But, believe me, I'm going to be busy this week.

One thing I'm working on is my next novel. Which is actually a return to an old novel but, you know, I want to keep that NaNo spirit burning for as long as I can. Anyhow, it's what I wrote - or tried to write - last November. I always meant to get back to it in the hopes that I could do it justice and, now, I think I can. It's a bit personal for me since it strikes close to some things I've tried to work out myself but I think that's where good art comes from - a personal, private place, that you rip out of your chest and show to the world in the hopes it responds. With a bit more distance, a bit more maturity, and a lot more practice I think my writing's going to be stronger.

The story is set in the closed test of an upcoming video game. Featuring the people playing it, in the end, it's about how the experience affects them. I'll hopefully have more to say about it in the coming days and weeks but, for the moment, here's my current logline: "A ragtag guild of lovable losers in the closed test of an MMORG have to deal with their unexpected success and inevitable failure." Which is a bit long for a logline but I don't think "A guild of lovable losers has to deal with their unexpected success" is descriptive enough.

I'm already in pre-production. Laying out the characters and scenes and everything else I've learned I'll need before starting out. If there's one thing Frenzy taught me it's that planning pays off in the end. And if there's one thing NaNo taught me it's that it's better to do something at all rather than nothing. I'm a bit excited about it, in case you can't tell. Don't know what it is but I enjoy building these worlds more than I do working them out into finished form.

Outage

Blargh. Backles.

Oh well, so much for unmentioned new blogging year's resolution to post at least once a day, every day. Strangely enough, it wasn't my legendary unreliability or epic apathy which cost me my weeks old streak of unbroken posting. Instead, it was my ISP. My internet went out sometime on Monday and has only recently been fully restored after much jiggling and wiggling of the cabled connections of my makeshift network (Sure, if I'd really wanted to I could have found a way to get online, somehow, and post. But you have to understand I'm really, really lazy.). I was seriously worrying that I wouldn't be able to validate my word count as NaNo drew to a close. My own novel is still uncompleted but, dammit, I've written more than enough to get my prize this month, especially with everything that's tried to keep me from that goal.

Anyhow, a day full of catching up with missed e-mails and messages, checking in on sites, and everything else that I wasn't able to do while I was briefly excluded from the electronic wonderland that the magic cable brings into my home has left me drained.

I also made the mistake of turning on the Republican debate (Since the Dem's primary is screwed, I figure I'd cross the aisle, suck it up, hold my nose, and pull the lever for that mythical "least objectionable" choice. That or try and royally screw them over. But I have to at least know who the candidates are so it's research time.) for all of about five minutes before my brain recoiled in horror. This? This?!? This is the best the Republicans have to offer? Millions of people are going to vote for whichever empty suit comes out of that dogpile of shame and mendacity? Jesus wept and Shiva ran away with the tears.

I'll try and see about getting some actually content up tomorrow. For now, though, here, our current mission statement:

I Post A Lot For Someone on a Break, Don't I?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I'm still waiting for inspiration to strike about what to do with my cake.

Turns out that, contrary to The Plan, we won't be heading to the Lions' game tomorrow after all. Couldn't get tickets and not willing to pay the scalper's premium. It's been a while since we've been to one anyway – one of my uncles used to get free tickets but our yearly tradition of watching ended when that perk did – so it's not a big deal. I'm still just amazed that it's going to be a meaningful game. But even more that it's going to be the day's other games that promises to be the stinker. I don't know about you but Dallas and the lowly Jets sounds like a blowout. And the Colts demolishing the Falcons who are going back to Joey Ballgame again, doesn't sound too appealing to me. At least, not as much as watching fierce divisional rivals try to take each other out, Detroit's home field advantage (Which, trust me, kicks into another gear for the Thanksgiving games) trying to pin another loss on the seemingly unstoppable Packers. I'm pretty sure the schedule makers had no idea that the games were going to play out like that heading into the season but there it is. Be a nice game to see.

Instead, though, we're going to be heading downtown for the parade. Another Detroit institution. But looking at the latest weather reports, it looks like it's going to be a cold, snowy day. I think I might just have to give it a pass.

Anyhow, I might be too weighed down with foodstuffs or too desperately trying to warm to stagger back to the blog tomorrow. So, if I don't, here's hoping your Thanksgiving is one warmed by good company and good spirits.

Can't Blog Now

Writing.

The Man, the Myth, the Game

Sadly, I did not manage to get a lot of writing done last night. Just as I was about to settle in, I made one last pass at my inbox and, lo and behold, there was an invite for the Mythos beta waiting for me.

I sign up for a lot of betas and I very seldom get in. At this point, I half suspect there's some kind of global CR association where the chilling tales of my behavior in the GW test have spread. Still, I signed up for Mythos months ago. When a flurry of Mythos posts went through the gaming blogosphere, I put my e-mail in again on the off chance they'd lost it - I guess that turned out to be a good thing since the message on the official site does, in fact, say they lost all the e-mail applications they gathered over the summer. I must have been high on the list because I resubmitted right after that right after that.

When I got the invite, I had to think a bit to remember which game Mythos was, exactly. Then it hit me, "Oh yeah, that's the Diablo clone that's free." There's no part of that sentence I don't like, by the way. So I spent a bit of time familiarizing myself with it. Hunting down the reviews and previews and forums and other resources I'll be drawing on to become informed about it. Because, I can't help but compare it to Guild Wars which also carried, somewhat, the Diablo mantle. And, you know, that's one of the big things that drew me to that game in the first place. A nice hack and slash that's not going to cost me anything in which I can occasionally bump into or make some new friends? I'm kinda surprised I haven't been camping out at a fansite and trying to weasel my way into the test already. Because that sounds like exactly what I'm in the market for.

Yeah, it's free. Completely. They're planning to basically give the game away. Free to download, free to play, low system requirements, there's really no reason not to give this game a try when it comes out. Likely going to be supported through the sale of special uber items at some kind of online store. Microtransactions get a deservedly bad rap because most game companies see them as ways to gouge their customers but I think they have a lot of potential. And a game like this just might be the one that proves it. But even if it doesn't it's looking pretty solid so far.

The art is wonderful but a little too cutesy for my tastes. They're not exactly cutting edge, either, which accounts for the game's low system requirements. Really, I don't care about that so much as I do about the gameplay. And since the gameplay here is lifted straight out of the Diablo playbook, I'm going to be happy.

My main concern, though, is pretty much the same as Brinstar's complaint about HG:L. I play Guild Wars and I'm used to the way that game works. When my skills aren't working, when I run into an encounter I can't handle, it's easy to switch my build to something different. I've become accustomed to being able to respecc painlessly. Now, I don't necessarily need a GW style skill bar and drop down menu but being permanently wedded to choices I made back when I had no idea what I was doing bothers me - I know they're planned to add respeccs, somehow, to HG:L but from what I've read and seen of Mythos it's not in yet and the only way to alter your skill choices is to reroll. Not such a big deal now, in beta, where wipes and changes will be so common that it won't really matter but it's something I hope gets easier by release. As I said, it doesn't have to be easy or automatic but some way of making up for novice mistakes is going to have to be there or I won't be playing for long.

Another thing that gives me pause it that this game is being touted as an MMO. Guild Wars fought that battle long and hard and, if you ask me, it never really should have. This kind of game needs to be casual, needs to be the kind you'll log on for an hour or two with the option of sinking a whole day into whatever it is that draws you to the game. Marking it out as an MMO is just going to attract the kind of crowd that expects a free game to compete with WoW or WAR or whatever. And I could really do without another promising game that turns into a grindfest.

I'd like to tell you how the game actually is rather than the fleeting impressions I've gotten reading up on it. But, as I said earlier, I haven't been able to get in yet. I tried to get in last night, roll up a new character, get a quick look at the skill trees and the mechanics, and just have it sitting there tempting me to up my word count and earn a reward. But, instead, I spent an hour or two figuring out why the game wasn't working. Still at it again today but, for now, I'm calling it a day. I've got word wars to wage and plots holes to sew, after all.

Oooh! Oooh! I just thought of a totally awesome name for my new book. By the Flickering Candle's Light. No, By Flickering Candlelight. Awesome. Must go write now while the inspiration is hot.

I Haven't Done Enough to Be Exhausted Yet

Still on a bit of a writer's high from yesterday's celebration. I know it doesn't seem like a big deal but given my track record of abandoned projects and half-finished works just sticking around this long is an accomplishment for me. Considering I started this blog up to get my mental pen moving last NaNo I'm amazed.

In case I haven't made it clear enough by now, I've junked my first NaNo novel and I've started up another one. Look at it this way, I already have 60k or so. Enough to "win", so everything else is gravy. But my first book was proving to be too intractible and too big to ever hope to complete. Rather than gutting it in hopes of finding an endpoint somewhere I'm going to shelve all my work on it for now and start fresh with a new tale. I might not get around to it immediately after November but, you know, the outline for the story I'm working on now languished in a notebook for years before I got inspired by it again. I'll get back to it one of these days.

For now, it's a new year for this blog and a new manuscript for me. I haven't had much of a chance to work on it yet (And, yes, I hear the clock ticking, I really need to get moving on it. But you don't understand I've been completely unmotivated and I've still managed to crank out several k a day and update this site and do a half dozen other things until my head is spinning around and I'm collapsing asleep the second I hit the pillow. It's great. But the belabored point being that I know once I settle in and start working I can get this done. Which means I'm not worried that I'm dicking around a bit too much.) but I've already got some strong scenes planned. A few thousand in the bank already, too. I'm going to hit it up once I finish here and try to get that word meter full up again.

Let's see, what else? There's the writer's strike but I think plenty of people have that covered already.

People aren't as dumb as the media thinks.

And I'm going to bet that most of the people who come here are already familiar with Penny Arcade but I'll point this out anyway. Bioware is looking for some writers and they want them to come up with a NWN module showcasing your dialog abilities for the application. The requirements on the official page sound pretty daunting - a writing portfolio, 2~5 years of experience, and the usual PR fluff - but given the tone of the e-mail posted at PA, I gather it's the sort of thing where a good demo makes up for a lot of deficiencies. Might be worth looking into. I know I will, once I can find the time.

Anyhow, off to work on my own book.

The Paper Clock Winds

We're on to year two now. I think we closed out our first year of blogging strongly although I didn't even manage to get to half the posts I dreamt up over the weekend. Let alone all the scraps I've left strewn on bits of paper and files all over the place. It bothers me sometimes that I have all these wonderful ideas that never see the light of day. But not at the omemtn because, for now, I understand that it's important just to have them and to cull the best and most promising of them to work on that really matters.

Didn't work much on my novel today. I meant to but as I was leaving work someone asked me, "Hey, Saus, you're a gigantic sucker, would you mind driving me to the airport?" And, of course, I said yes which, because of construction, meant a long detour through he ass ugly end of downtown and idling in my car in a sea of parked steel. All of which added up to another long round trip that bit into my novel time. It's like the universe is conspiring to keep me from writing this month.

Which, again, doesn't really bother me since I'd always planned to pause the breakneck pace today in order to take a look around. I spent a while diving into my archives, looking through some of the posts I've made over the past year and more. And, honestly, I'm pretty pleased with the final product. I could have done better, I could have worked harder, but, in the end, I think I've done something here to be proud of.

I'm not sure what next year will bring. As usual, I hope for brighter and better. But we'll see. At the moment, I'm just happy to have hung on for this long and I'd be thrilled just to be here the same time next year talking about another year having gone by.

The Long and Winding Road

I'm back from my trip to the family cottage. It was a long, dark ride through the perilous night back and I'm about to collapse from exhaustion if not a crippling case of car butt, so you'll forgive me if I'm brief. I have a warm, inviting bed calling out to me. This was the latest I've ever made the trip up and there's a very good reason why - it gets damn cold this time of year. I spent last night trying to figure out if the chimney had been cleaned recently. And then deciding I didn't really car if I did set the place on fire, I'd appreciate the warmth.

Anyhow, it's good to be back in a place that has central heating. I did manage to get some writing done over the weekend but I had to do it all longhand in a notebook. Right now, I'm too tired to transcribe it all. I'm not even sure I should bother, though. It's such a mess at the moment. I'm something like 60k in and I'm not even through the first chapter. And there's a huge hole at the center of it that I've been trying to hammer out for a solid week now. Sitting in my inbox waiting for me to get home was the weekly pep talk. It's all about a writer's fatigue. And I'm definitely feeling it right now.

Although...driving home I had an idea about what to do with my novel. A rather extreme idea. But I'm going to sleep on it. For now.

I'm Outta Here

No blogging today since I'm unexpectedly heading out of time. You might recall but back when the dog first got sick there was a small chance I would need to head up to the family cottage to properly winterize it. That didn't happen and, instead, I got to spend that weekend whittling away the hours in the Costume Brawl. But, the cottage still needs to be closed up and I've been volunteered to do it. Karma at work. So, I'm about to pack up and hop in the car and get my drive on. It's something like eight or nine hours and I'll have to ply the two-lane country roads in the dark. Fun.

This, of course, means bad news for my word count since my laptop gave up the ghost some time last month. Instead, I'll be bringing along a notebook and doing the long hand thing. I can't scribble nearly as fast as I can type and it'll take me forever to transcribe anything I happen to write but, hey, it'll be something.

Anyhow, should be back after the weekend just in time for the one year blogaversary spectacular. Until then.